Skip to main content

who's afraid of the big bad wolf?

You have to read Lisa's on this one, it's a poem and it's awesome.

DARK. I am afraid of the dark. I didn't think I was until I got married and had someone to witness my fear. The good news is I'm confident enough in my skin to not really care about ruining my tough-girl image. I turn the lights on all the way back to our room when I go to bed. Hall light on, living room off, bedroom hall on, hall light off, Light beside my bed on, bedroom hall light off. Worth it.

I also will not look at a mirror without a light on. I'm sure it stems from "Bloody Mary" as a child/preteen, but I am genuinely afraid I will see a ghost/spirit beside me. I just don't want to deal with that, so I turn the light on or run by.

I also will not run after dark, even if it's with a buddy. I wish I could because I often get home from work when it's dark except now, when it's 105 degrees still... anyways, I'm really scared of being attacked in the dark.

LOSING ERIC. I mentioned this on my 20 facts post. But the fact that he got cancer with a 40% cure rate for no reason at the ripe old age of 26, I mean, come on. Then we found out he has polycystic kidney disease, which runs in his family, which is also linked to brain aneurysm. Which is what caused his mom's death. Sigh.

He calls himself a lemon. I don't. I call him Glemonade. haha. lame joke. couldn't resist.

I mean, we got his brain scanned this year to make sure nothing is developing and it's not. So we are good. But I'd be lying if i didn't say I was afraid. It's not every day.
Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

I had a baby.

It's a boy. I actually came to blogger to write about something else, but then I realized I haven't announced that I did, in fact, birth my child, and he did, in fact, make it here, which I'm not making light of. It is a fact I repeat to myself often. He is here, we made it. I am his mother and Eric is his father. He is a person and he learns every day. While it is easy to see him for what he is most right now, which is CUTE , he is also mellow and funny and happy, observant and sometimes timid, and sometimes noisy, aware and eager to grow. It is an amazingly wonderful and spiritual thing and I'm grateful every day for my son and the opportunity to raise him each day. I have had too many close to home tragedies recently to take this for granted. My dear neighbor and friend lost her son at 4 years old, an unexplainable accident that took him home to Heavenly Father. Another, my sister's closest friend, lost her son at 39 weeks pregnant, his body born to his famil...
Post a Comment
Read more

If You Know Hospitals...

... then you might have suspected how much our plans would change this week. Yesterday Eric went in for the bone marrow biopsy and they decided to keep him overnight and do the PT Scan as well. This was a change of plans we welcomed, despite the fact that I had to stay home while he stayed up there. We are very grateful that they did both procedures yesterday, so that hopefully we will know everything by tomorrow (again, here I am, trying to make plans!). They only biopsied one hip, and the only part that hurt was the needle to numb him, "like a hundred bee stings" I believe he said. Then Peggy and Eric waited in the waiting room until they fixed the scan machine and he was admitted to a room: the exact same room as the one we stayed in over Thanksgiving, in fact. One of the nurses didn't even know he'd left! We have a few updates on the condition of his cancer. First, they have narrowed it down to two types of lymphoma: Hodgkin or PTCL. We are hoping it is Hodgkin, b...
16 comments
Read more

If I could change the world...

I can't be the only one that every time I read that phrase still hears that annoying song from Phenomenon by Eric Clapton. But, with a more sober tone, I am so saddened right now that to look at this topic and not think about mass shootings and police violence, and violence against police, is impossible. I've not been writing this post because I feel like it deserves more time and deep thought than I have been able to muster. But can't you feel it, from everywhere? Everyone is so tired, we are so tired of fighting, so tired of anger, of hate, of injustice, of intolerance. I look around and see most of us do want to get along, we want peace and safety, mercy and if not that at least justice. Every week now there are more, not just one but several killings, shootings, and if not shootings it's a truck, it's a bomb, it's something. Aren't we all just tired? What can we do? I know the solution we have is to be part of the change, be kind, be thoughtful...
3 comments
Read more